Mind for a Mop

Seeing as this week's lesson fell on thanksgiving week, we did not go into much depth about the assigned topics. Despite this, i thoroughly enjoyed the article assigned for Tuesday's preparation. The article, by Dennis Prager, is entitled "Does a Full-Time Homemaker Swap her Mind for a Mop?" This article addresses an issue that I am particularly passionate about. In our world, it is common that women to not feel valued unless they attain a high level education, or work a high paying job. Motherhood is frequently underestimated. In a sense, the world sees motherhood as an "entry level job" while it requires amazing amounts of flexibility, diversity, patience, and resilience. Prager poses the question of whether full-time mothers are trading intellectual potential for the tedious chore of motherhood. In our society, there is obvious feminist pressure in regards to motherhood. This pressure is devaluing the divine role of motherhood.

Dennis Prager insists that while motherhood is demanding, there are ways that full time mothers can expand or enhance their intellectual progression. Prager states, "So it is not only nonsense that full-time homemaking means swapping the mind for a mop. It is also nonsense that the vast majority of paid work outside the home develops the mind. One may prefer to work outside the home for many reasons: a need or desire for extra income; a need to get out of the house; a need to be admired for work beyond making a home; a need for regular interaction with other adults. But the development of the intellect is not necessarily among them." I appreciate the fact that Prager addresses the fact that while some feel a need to work outside of the home, This is not the only source of intellectual progression. Often, those who work full time do not receive the same intellectual stimulation that a mother may. Motherhood is not the equivalent of intellectual abandonment, but is quite the opposite. 

Communication and Mutual Problem Solving

Communication is extremely effective. It can either make or break any relationship. When we communicate effectively, problem solving is a much simpler process. We were shown a quote in class this week that stated "You can never not communicate.You can only mis-communicate." a first I was skeptical, and did not necessarily agree/understand, but after our class discussion, I realized that this statement is absolutely correct. Although it may not be verbally, we are constantly communicating. Even silence is a means of communication. It is important, especially in a marriage, that effective communication is the formula to happiness. When faced with trials, couples can overcome obstacles through correct encoding and decoding of thoughts, ideas, and feelings.There is as much responsibility on the decoder as there is on the encoder. Many see communication as a one way street, when in fact, decoding what the communicator is trying to relay is even more important. The specific process of encoding and decoding is drawn out as such;

THOUGHT/FEELING/IDEA----ENCODE----MEDIA----DECODE----THOUGHT/FEELING/IDEA

It begins with a thought. The communicator encodes their thought, or in other words, attempts to "communicate" their thought. There are multiple methods of media that can be used to communicate a thought or idea. These forms of media include words, tone, non-verbal etc. After using media to encode an idea, the recipient must decode, or interpret what the encoder is communicating. The decoder then knows, or attempts to know, the encoder's thought

All of this being said, in relation to marriage, I believe that transparency is key to effective communication. As couples communicate, it is important to be open, honest and effective. As communication improves, so os the quality of the relationship.

The Family under Stress

Each family faces their own unique hardships, and each family reacts differently to opposition. I appreciated this weeks lessons because they made me appreciate my family and our ability to cope with major obstacles that have been put in our path. In class, we discussed different things that families can do to prepare for the inevitable stress that they will undergo. We also discussed different coping methods and techniques that families can use to deal with stressful situations. We discussed some possible situations that might cause copious amounts of stress such as death, infidelity, and divorce. I concluded that in order to successfully endure such trials, a family must develop healthy habits before the trial occurs. Such habits might include open communication, frequent interaction, honesty, and centering their families in faith. 

While learning about families under stress, I found myself frequently reflecting on my family's past hardships. When I was fourteen years old, my father passed away unexpectedly in a car accident. It was interesting now to evaluate the way that each individual dealt with the situation, and how my family overcame it as a whole. Our situation was obviously very stressful. It was absolutely heartbreaking, but because of habits that we had previously developed, my family handled it better than I ever would have expected. The time that we spent as a family before my father died helped us to all grow closer as a unit. Because of such unity, we all felt comfortable leaning on one another for comfort and support. We always practiced open and frequent communication. Because of this, I felt that i could talk to my mother and siblings about the feelings that I had, which helped tremendously. Because my mother and father had established a Christ centered home, I had a firm testimony in the plan of salvation, knowing that I would see my father someday. This was perhaps the thing that brought me the most comfort during such a difficult trial. Such reflection made me appreciate my mother and father even more than I already did. Because of the healthy habits that they established when they were first married, their children were blessed during a trial that could have ultimately torn us apart.

Sexual Intimacy and Family Life

Contrary to what I anticipated, this week was one of my favorite weeks, and I learned much more than I imagined. I have always thought that sex education was highly under valued, The way that our society views sexual intimacy is contrary to that of God. Sexual intimacy is a way for couples to become one with God, strengthen bonds within marriage, and procreate. It is a divine gift given to us that should only happen between husband and wife. Because sexual intimacy is so sacred, it can be extremely destructive as it occurs outside of the bonds of holy matrimony. It saddens me to know that many view sex as sinful, shameful, casual, or even recreational. Although it should not, sexual intimacy can be a source of negative feelings, or even guilty feelings. As couples experience inevitable hardships, conflict and contention can bleed into the couple's sex life, causing contention and deepened controversy.

Much of our conversation in class this week revolved around the differences regarding sexual response between males and females. While sexual expression is a healthy part of our behavior, men and women experience sexual expression differently. Men are typically quicker to experience orgasm and resolution than women.Women typically take longer to reach orgasm, and they also take more time in the resolution stage. These differences could serve as either a challenge or an opportunity to grow. When experiencing these differences, it is important for each partner to be aware of their partners needs. When one partner is unaware, or simply not concerned with their other partner's situation, it can cause frustration and contention. These differences can also give coupes the opportunity to practice efficient communication, and grow with one another.